Title – Gran Turismo (2023) 

Director – Neill Blomkamp (District 9) 

Cast – Archie Madekwe, Orlando Bloom, David Harbour, Djimon Hounsou, Geri Horner

Plot – Based on the true story of British teenager Jann Mardenborough’s (Madekwe) rise from gamer to professional race driver after winning a competition that aimed to turn lounge-room experts into certified athletes. 

“If you miss a line in the game, you reset. You miss it on the track, you could die”

Review by Eddie on 16/08/2023

In 2009, up and coming director Neill Blomkamp won fans all over the globe with his release of District 9, a sci-fi debut for the ages that suggested we had just witnessed the arrival of a new generational talent. 

Fast forward to August 2023 and that very same director is back with his highest profile film in years, a glorified 2 hour plus Playstation commercial with a core cast that includes everyone’s favourite Netflix sheriff/father figure and Ginger Spice. 

BASED ON A TRUE STORY! (In case the marketing teams message didn’t quite come across in its incessant reminders to us all that this is not fantasy), Gran Turismo is one of the most inoffensive yet blandest blockbusters of the year as Blomkamp forgoes any of the creativity he showed with District 9 and his lesser sci-fi offerings Elysium and Chappie to put us in the fast lane with Archie Madekwe’s Jann Mardenborough, a British gamer who left the comfort of his bedroom driving rig to enter into the very real (and very dangerous) world of organised racing. 

Following all the tropes in the book and delivering them in a way that makes one suspect the Playstation executives and producers of the film here may as well have sat on Blomkamp’s directors chair through the whole process of this film coming to life, you almost wish that Gran Turismo was far worse in a notable way than it is here as the way in which its been bought to life makes it hard to hate with a passion, leaving it as one of those odd films that exists (for whatever reason that may be outside of hoping to sell a few extra PS5 consoles), only to be forgotten about before we’ve had time to contemplate its being. 

Reported to have a budget ranging in the $100 million dollar range, Blomkamps crowd-pleaser certainly has a shiny outer rig and it’s the exact type of film that is sure to appeal to casual and less demanding of film-goers, racing fans and those that have spent hours on the tracks in the Gran Turismo franchise over the years but for anyone that likes to steer well clear of cliches, one note characters, talented cast members collecting an easy cheque or scripts that feel as though they went through more than a singular draft, Blomkamp’s effort here isn’t going to provide much value. 

With a hamstrung cast, that sadly sees the likes of David Harbour and Djimon Hounsou slumming it with roles they could play in their sleep and a hamming it up Orlando Bloom as Nissan marketing guru Danny Moore chewing scenery like its a tasty piece of candy, there was a chance that Gran Turismo’s on track action could elevate the overall vibe of the feature or at least ramp up the thrills but compared to recent race-centric offerings like Ford v Ferrai or Rush, Blomkamp’s film pales in comparison, unable to ever get its drama or its spectacle out of first gear. 

Final Say – 

There have been far worse video game adaptations in the history of cinema, a billion dollar effort earlier in 2023 a prime example, but there’s no escaping from the fact that Gran Turismo is an instantly forgettable and entirely unimaginative crowd-pleaser that is destined to be forgotten long before the fumes have dissipated.

2 Kenny G songs out of 5